I live in Bray, Co Wicklow with my husband Cian and our son Sacha and daughter Kim and Tom the cat. Im 38 years old, but in my own head I still believe Im 25. Every now and then, I look in the mirror and wonders what’s happened to the face I used to own.

In August 2005, I discovered I was carrying the potentially deadly cancer carrying gene, BrCa 1. In plain English, this meant I had a whooping 85% chance of developing breast cancer, and a 50% chance of developing ovarian cancer.

In 2006, I chose to have a bi-lateral mastectomy (or both breasts removed) and a bi-lateral oopherectomy (or both ovaries removed) to prevent cancer striking.
I wasn’t actually sick at the time, but I felt like a ticking time bomb. Opting for surgery was not a shocking or scary decision, for me. Quite the opposite, I felt huge relief. I was glad there was something I could do to make my body safer.
After breast reconstruction, I thought I had pipped cancer at the post and would happily sail off into the distance.
But that wasnt to be. In 2007, I was diagnosed with breast cancer, in the neck, shoulder and under my arm. Deciding it might be a bit lonely the cancer invited an auto-immune disease, called dermatomyositis along for the ride. Not only was I shocked and more than a little peeved, but I really longed to have an auto-immune disease with a shorter name. It took me a week to be able to both spell and pronounce dermatomyositis. With the help of Dr David Fennelly and the team in Blackrock Clinic in Dublin, I beat the cancer.
In 2008, the cancer came back. Yes, not satisfied that it had done enough damage, the cancer appeared in the form of another tumour under my left arm. That was duely carved out by the surgical team at St Vincents Hospital in Dublin. For my trouble I also got a free ticket aboard the chemotherapy bus for another six month tour. In December 2008, I was given the all clear once again. Fantastic!
In 2009 before I could perform a victory dance, the cancer came back again. Cheeky bastard. This time I had radiation therapy which was exhausting and draining, but it worked and besides, it was research for my memoir Talk to the Head Scarf. The general idea at that stage was that the cancer might have had enough.
But I cant control if and when my cancer returns, so 2010 became my worst year for nasty nodal invasion - I ended up with four out breaks bringing my total to 7. (A lucky number for some)
I was on an oral form of chemotherapy called Xeloda, which meant I simply took the tablets at home. Although I felt tired and need to be frugal with my energy, they didnt present me with too many problems. At first they worked and seemed to be killing the cancer. But several months later I noticed new nodes. In fact they began to pop up around my neck, ears and around my collar bone.
At the moment (June 2011) I am on a different chemotherapy drug. Its back to the IV stuff, which meant I had to have a new port put back in my neck. But the news is really positive. I go in once a week, which may sound a lot, but I dont mind in the least because its working! The nodes are nearly all gone and Im tolerating the drug really well. I have minimal nausea and although I still get tired, I feel its all a small price to pay. Im very optimistic that this drug will work and clear my body of cancer. What can I say? I live in hope that cancer will finally get bored and leave me alone!
Im still on another drug called Avastin, which helps prevent the cancer from returning. So every second Monday I get Taxol and Avastin. A cocktail of magic juice that is working wonders! I havent lost my hair as Im using scalp cooling, which freezes the follicles and prevents my hair from being fried off my head.
To sum it all up - I lost my hair. Its grown back. I was very ill at one stage, weak as a kitten and limp as dead daisy, but I am still here and willing to fight. Ive had dark days (and hair before I could colour it again) and long